The Dazzies!

[Swellin]

The Golden Raspberry Awards (also known as the Razzies and Razzie Awards) is a parody award show honouring the worst of cinematic failures - Worst Movie/Actress/Actor eyc. What if we did a Dallas version of all the failures in Dallas called the Dazzies. Possible categories:

• Worst Storyline e.g. Haleyville, Emerald Mines, Lucy working as a waitress
• Worst New Character e.g. anyone from Season 11-13
• Worst Couple e.g. Bobby & April, Ray & Jenna, J.R & Cally
• Worst Character exit e.g. Pam, Jock
• Worst Cliffhanger e.g. J.R in the mental hospital, Sue Ellen's movie
• Worst Female Character hairstyle e.g. Pam's poodle perm
• Worst Actor/Actress replacement Jenna/Miss Ellie/Pam
• Worst character re-introduction e.g. Pam, Katherine, Jessica

Who would you vote for and any other categories.?

 

[Toni]

My choices:

Worst Storyline: Anyone focused on April
Worst New Character: April
Worst Couple: Bobby and any woman who is not Pam
Worst Character exit: Pam
Worst Cliffhanger: Sue Ellen's movie
Worst Female Character hairstyle: April´s
Worst Actor/Actress replacement: Miss Ellie
Worst character re-introduction: Katherine

Suggestions:
Worst "Dramatic Scene": Jenna on her knees grieving for "dead" Bobby
Worst Drunk Scene: Lucy after watching Peter and Sue Ellen dancing
Worst Dream Season Scene: Sue Ellen waking up and yelling
Worst Characters who came out of nowhere: Sue Ellen´s bunch of bitchy friends after divorcing J.R. (first time)
Worst Animal Performance: Darius
Worst Child Performance: Charlie x 1.000
Worst Party Gown: Mandy Winger in silver paper at OBB from Season 10

 

[Angela Channing]

Worst Storyline - Bobby chases after Jory Taylor
Worst New Character - Laurel Ellis
Worst Couple - Carter McKay and Rose
Worst Character exit - Jordan Lee
Worst Cliffhanger - Sue Ellen shows JR her film then immediately cans it.
Worst Female Character - I don't know about female hairstyles but to any character, I would say JR's toupee
Worst Actor/Actress replacement - Jenna Wade played by Prissy Presley
Worst character re-introduction - Pamela after the crash only to be abandoned by Bobby

 

[Taylor Bennett Jr.]

Worst Storyline - Haleyville
Worst New Character - Cally (actress was fine, character was stupid)
Worst Couple - Bobby and April
Worst Character exit - Andy Bradley vanishing without a trace - why didn’t a character this dynamic get a phone booth assassination of his own, or at least maybe a public toilet?
Worst Cliffhanger - JR in the sanitarium
Worst Female Character hairstyle - Butchy Sue Ellen in the ‘Young Peter Richards’ year
Worst Actor/Actress replacement - Marc Singer as Bobby’s college football buddy (blasphemy)
Worst character re-introduction - Marc Singer as Bobby’s college football buddy (blasphemy 2)

 

[CeeCee72]

Worst Storyline: Haleyville
Worst New Character: James
Worst Couple: JR & Vanessa
Worst Character exit: Pam
Worst Cliffhanger: Sue Ellen's movie
Worst Female Character hairstyle: Pam's poodle perm
Worst Actor/Actress replacement: Miss Ellie
Worst character re-introduction: Mandy

 

[CeeCee72]

Worst Party Gown: Mandy Winger in silver paper at OBB from Season 10

Looked like jiffy pop popcorn

 

[James from London]

Lucy working as a waitress

Lucy after watching Peter and Sue Ellen dancing

Sue Ellen´s bunch of bitchy friends after divorcing J.R. (first time)

Laurel Ellis
Worst Couple - Carter McKay and Rose
Worst Character exit - Jordan Lee

Jenna Wade played by Prissy Presley

Worst Couple: JR & Vanessa

I really enjoyed all of those.

 

[Willie Oleson]

Worst Storyline - Donna & Ray's adoption storyline and the way it tried to educate the audience about deaf children. It's not a favourite genre of mine and the only soapy adoption I like is Sable Colby trying to adopt grandson Scott Cassidy - because she has an ulterior motive.
On the other hand, the most thrilling moment in an adoption storyline was Pam's super-soapy misinterpretation when Bobby brought Christopher to Southfork.

Worst New Character - spirit Adam.

Worst Couple - hmmm....Ray & Jenna?

Worst Character exit - Leslie Stewart, such an intriguing character but there was no payoff.

Worst Cliffhanger - I was going to say "Pam wakes up", but the moment itself was great, just like the Moldavian Massacre. Sue Ellen's movie doesn't even make sense because the Ewings were always front-page news and JR never tried to disguise his true nature. Caress' Sister Dearest, on the other hand...

Worst Female Character Hair - all of them, at some point.

Worst Actor/Actress replacement - the Miss Ellie recast, but this feels like a kicking-in-open-doors question.

Worst character re-introduction - what did Lucy achieve during her comeback? Re-marry and re-divorce...something else?

 

[Willie Oleson]

Worst Female Character Hair - all of them, at some point.

Excluding Mandy.

 

[Willie Oleson]

Caress' Sister Dearest, on the other hand...

Why did I not mention Capricorn Crude?

 

[Taylor Bennett Jr.]

Looked like jiffy pop popcorn

I *knew* there was a reason I thought she and Cliff were soulmates!

(seen above: an ecstatic Cliff in what would have been a dazzling matching outfit for the big Ball)

 

[Willie Oleson]

Also: worst use (un-use) of character: Jimmy Maha Moga....Pam's cousin.

But I feel he sort of returned as Drew Ramos.

 

[Taylor Bennett Jr.]

Also: worst use (un-use) of character: Jimmy Maha Moga....Pam's cousin.

But I feel he sort of returned as Drew Ramos.

the thing is.. with his ability to change into entirely different people, how could we be sure that any new character we saw at any point wasn’t actually Cousin Jimmy?

With the stealthy and devious Aunt Maggie pulling the strings behind the scenes, virtually anything was possible!

 

[Willie Oleson]

how could we be sure that any new character we saw at any point wasn’t actually Cousin Jimmy?

We may have accidentally stumbled upon the one and only true answer to the Great Dallas Paradox.

Unfortunately that also brings us to the new paradox: how many times did Bobby actually die, only to be resurrected by cousin Jimmy?