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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Hawkman" data-source="post: 326614" data-attributes="member: 23715">7.3 Nine Lives KatHow an earth does one describe this episode, with difficulty that's how.Kat, short for Katerina is a copper with the nickname '9 lives' is investigating a child's disappearance. But she's been removed from the case, she's an alcoholic, using vodka to wet her breakfast cereal instead of milk. She's assisted by a copper Ezra Jones, keeps turning up at her house with news of the search for the boy.Then Kat awakes......was it a dream?In her bed is copper Barnabus Bull ,nothing sexual going on, they both got drunk and crashed out the night before. Bull is her partner on the case. In the kitchen Kat has her usual Vodka and cereal as the case is further discussed. When Jones here again helps Bull make tea in the kitchen this leaves Kat free to rifle through Jones jacket and in a wallet finds a photo of Jones with the missing boy.Kat confronts Jones, and wants to know why he keeps turning up in her house when she never gave him a key. Jones says it's not actually her house, he says he's tried so hard with Kat but it's not working out ,her character is not shaping up. He's an author and Kat is fictional, a drunken copper with issues and an odd police partner in Barnabus Bull. Kat wants to know why Jones has a photo of the missing boy. Jones just used his son in this story to help him create the character. Jones tests his characters believability by making them real inside his head and playing out scenes in his imagination, but Kat is a failure and the notes on her creation must be placed in storage in the bottom drawer of his writing desk.Kat insists she's real with a daughter asleep upstairs, Jones asks Kat what her daughter's name is, Kat can't answer,  Jones says that's because he didn't give her one, the child was a last minute character tossed in to make Kat more interesting,  but it hasn't worked out.Bull is apparently a better bet, he can envisage a series of books with him as lead character.Barnabus Bull, in the kitchen too, but er...fictional suggests titles such as Red Rag To A Bull and Bullseye, Kat chimes in with " Bullsh*t." Jones closes a folder of notes on his character Kat and tosses it in the drawer.And Ezra Jones awakes......what a strange dream!!Jones is now an award winning author, his Bull detective books have won him awards a-plenty. He lives with his wife in a beautiful home, but trouble as his wife wants to know where their son is, why didn't Ezra pick him up from school. Ezra shows her his phone and a text from her saying not to pick him up as she'll do it. But the wife says she lost her mobile and didn't send the text. Someone has kidnapped their son. Days go by no news is heard, Matilda Gordon police liaison officer comforts them.Next day Ezra wakes, goes downstairs and finds Matilda Gordon dead on the settee throat cut. [SPOILER]In the kitchen is the fictional Kat who's just come back to see how the story ends..Kat taking revenge for being dumped by Ezra for being a character he no longer wants to keep. Kat has the wife's lost mobile that she says Ezra had all along, and is framing Ezra for the kidnapping and Matilda Gordon's death. She opens the larder door and the dead Bull falls out. Jones is confused and says " I didn't write any of this." The wife turns up in the kitchen and she and Kat embrace in a long lesbian kiss. Jones asks Kat what she wants, she replies that she wants to solve the case,  beat alcoholism and toss her police badge in the river. Jones agrees, blackmailed by his own characters! The wife chips in with, " erm am I still a lesbian?"Bull gets up from the floor asking if he's still supposed to be dead.A woman cries out shouting at everyone to shut up.In the study is Matilda Gordon alive at her computer stating that this ending is ridiculous and trite and unbelievable, as an author she just can't do endings. This project started off as a good idea, an author Ezra Jones haunted by his own characters but has turned into a sub standard Stephen King. Ezra Jones insists he's real, an award winning author, but Matilda says " sorry darling but you're really not"Jones grabs one of his books, but on opening it sees all the pages are blank.Matilda says sorry Ezra, but into the bottom drawer you go. Matilda gets her folder notes about her character Ezra Jones and throws them in the drawer, to which Jones can only say, " oh sh*t."[/SPOILER][ATTACH=full]37987[/ATTACH][ATTACH=full]37988[/ATTACH]</blockquote>

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