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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Mel O&#039;Drama" data-source="post: 258662" data-attributes="member: 23">The Deadly Missiles / Bionic Beauty continuedBy their nature, beauty pageants are something I find very vacuous and shallow (and the jingoistic all-American version with references to the flag and God perhaps even more so). This seems to extend to the perfunctory episode of many female-led TV series in which the character “needs” to go undercover at such an event. Like the events themselves, the episodes frequently seem a curious combination of vanity and objectification. There’s a little of this in Bionic Beauty. And the clichés are hit here: the mandatory bitchy competitor who gives the protagonist a hard time (Dynasty’s future Sarah Curtis, no less); the corrupt controlling compère with whom bitchy competitor is in league; the old maid who is there to keep the girls in line; the lead actor showing off their multi-talents by performing; and so on. However it’s worth noting that this episode preceded similar episodes in Wonder Woman and Charlie’s Angels. Which perhaps means that the clichés only seem that way in retrospect. I’m not sure, but it’s quite possible that this was the first of its kind, in which case it’s more original than it may appear. There’s also a reasonably earthy approach to the business. Jaime is shown to have no interest in the pageant, and very resistant to the idea. Once there, she’s more concerned about the assignment. She wins the competition not because she’s the most beautiful and talented, but because the villains arrange it to ensure she’s kept in the spotlight and unable to pursue her mission. Indeed, we learn that bitchy Sally - for all her behind-the-scenes machinations - had won the competition fair and square. Nobody is more delighted than Jaime who can’t hand over her crown quickly enough. And, rather than getting her comeuppance, Sally is shown to be regretful over her actions and all too human. There are some more dodgy aspects to the episode. Like how Jaime - already internationally famous as a tennis pro who is believed by some to be dead - can appear in a national, televised event using her own name with no raised eyebrows. And how does this fit in with her employment as a schoolteacher. Wouldn’t her employers take a dim view of her entering a beauty pageant, even if it didn’t interfere with her working hours. The “vanity project for an actress to show off hitherto unseen talents” is also questionable. I don’t know if Lindsay requested to sing or if it was forced on her, but it comes across like an actress doing what she’s asked because it’s on the page. In much the same way that Kate Mulgrew gamely massacred Never Ending Song Of Love, while all present acted as though their senses weren't being violently assaulted. The song choice is an interesting one: Morris Albert’s Feelings. For as long as I can remember it’s a track that’s had a bland MOR image with almost laughably self-pitiful lyrics. And Jaime sings it for Steve. Lindsay is rather obviously ip-syncing rather badly, prompting me to check if it was her or a vocal double. And it turns out it is Lindsay. I’m not clear if she was meant to be amazing (the reactions of others seemed to suggest this) but in the days before autotune, it’s so-so. Not bad, and probably no worse than Lee Majors singing Jaime. But it’s a little weak and shaky at times. Which is fine with me as it seems wholly appropriate for the situation of a tennis player/schoolteacher/OSI agent doing karaoke.[MEDIA=youtube]zye2J6KPek0[/MEDIA]However, Joe Harnell, whose work on the series began with arranging Lindsay’s song here,  has a rather scathing memory of the situation:Ouch!</blockquote>

Verification: What month follows July?