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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Snarky Oracle!" data-source="post: 442068" data-attributes="member: 57984">I've been accused of being too "alert" (even from people I barely know). Of making things seem "more real" by my mere physical presence, leading friends to believe I've picked up on things about them (which they may or may not want me to notice - often both) that I've sometimes missed entirely and I'm just sitting there obliviously picking my nose.And it's a problem (not the nose-picking, as I try to avoid that in public) as I seem to make them feel more perceived than others do, which creates a dual reaction.I had an excruciatingly-intelligent, older friend years ago who had a partner dying in D.C. and, for a couple of years, would drive and fly up every other weekend (while I did things for him back home -- various errands, taking his car to the shoppe, etc..) and, on the weekend he was home, he'd go out with me and hit the bars, and he'd talk and talk about his issues of the time... A year or two after his partner died, we were once again seated at a bar -- his Cutty Sark and lime in one hand, a cigarette in the other as always -- and he admitted that whenever he thought back about the blur of the era when his partner was dying (as he often did) the first image he always had was of me, even though we weren't technically around each other all that much because we were usually at work or he was on his way to-or-from D.C... He even pointed out that he had temporarily cut off all of his other friends during that period because although they would try to "help," they always wound up "making it all about themselves". I sighed and offered, philosophically, that, "Well... that's just how people are. Even if they mean well, they just kind of do that." To which he responded, looking me dead in the eye, "You didn't do that." Leaving me silent.It seemed to be a compliment, but it's a double-edged one. I knew him well enough, and the way his mind worked, that he also resented the fact that I was a "better" friend to him than he knew he'd be to me were the circumstances flipped. (Which later proved to be true). I mean, he would also grumble that he was convinced his dead partner would never have reciprocated his efforts had their situation been flipped. (I don't know if that's accurate or not, because I never met his partner -- but it's the way my friend thought, mulling over things like that frequently).But it led to the slow ending of our own relationship. By his own concession, I was a key reminder of that sad period he understandably wanted to get away from, and he would re-embrace those other friends he knew he couldn't rely on. Becoming a wee bit unnecessarily ugly in the way he pushed me out. He could control his other friends, believing -- probably correctly -- that their superficial kindness to him was a result of his clever day-to-day manipulations (hence, all ducks were in a row) but my behavior came from being "better" and it left him uncomfortable because it wasn't due to his manipulation (or, if it was, I was aware of it, and he was aware I was aware of it, and I didn't rebel against it).Some people like you and dislike you for the same reason. They're drawn to you for the qualities they also can't handle. Respecting you makes them self-conscious, and you can't do a damned thing about it. He once described me, with a blend of contempt and amazement as "so phuckin' vulnerable!!" And nothing had happened... I mean, I don't weep at BAMBI... "Flamboyant but well-adjusted," was another one. (I'm not a flamer but prone to gesticulation).But he was right out of MIDNIGHT IN THE GARDEN OF GOOD & EVIL in a way, a Tennessee Williams-esque Deep South character, perpetually with a cocktail and a Virginia Slim in both claws. Sly and reptilian with a whiff of gothicity. A bitchy wit. Ethanol and nicotine wafting out and encircling him at all times.I hadn't seen nor spoken to him in nearly a decade when he died. But I seemed to experience some kind of "visitation" from him the day after he expired, although I wouldn't hear of his passing for another 15 months. Not that I really believe in stuff like that.   But I think of him fairly often, albeit with the requisite ambivalence. Both of us sidled up to a bar in a slightly sleazy location -- he to my left, always (the Devil's position), discussing the events of the world, popular culture, politics, human nature, etc.Scorpio Rising, of course.<img src="https://i.pinimg.com/originals/86/ab/84/86ab84e8dd294d1d3a65d8635d0682be.jpg" alt="" class="fr-fic fr-dii fr-draggable " style="" /></blockquote>

Verification: Who played JR Ewing?