Why "Cumson"?

[Willie Oleson]

Isn't it funny that a family of Italian origin (Giobertis) didn't look Italian at all?
Well, Angela married Douglas Channing, and Jason married Jacqueline. And then Chase married Maggie Hartford.
The only one with Italian/Latin looks was Lance, and that makes perfect sense because both Tony Cumsons were played by Italian-American actors.
But Cumson doesn't sound Italian at all.

It's so easy to "connect" Lance with his Italian Falcon Crest ancestors eventhough that has absolutely nothing to do with it.
Because he didn't get it from Julia.

I assume Angela and Jason's mother wasn't Italian/Hispanic either? Because Francesca looked like a full-blooded Gioberti, but her half-sister and half-brother didn't. Except Lance, but he wasn't.

 

[Snarky Oracle!]

Lance Cumson. Obviously a porn name, please.

 

[Willie Oleson]

But why? It's not that he needed a name like that to look sexy.

Besides, he didn't even have a moustache so I'm not sure I completely agree with you.

 

[Snarky Oracle!]

But why? It's not that he needed a name like that to look sexy.

Besides, he didn't even have a moustache so I'm not sure I completely agree with you.

They still give sexy porn stars porn star names.

And he's from the '80s -- pornstaches reached their peak circa 1979/80!

 

[Alexis]

They should have called him Lance Lollobrigida.

 

[Willie Oleson]

They still give sexy porn stars porn star names.

But Lance wasn't a porn star.

They should have called him Lance Lollobrigida

Yeah, something like that. Or Lance Cellini. Or Lance Lotti.

 

[Alexis]

But Lance wasn't a porn star.


Yeah, something like that. Or Lance Cellini. Or Lance Lotti.

Lance Alotti.

 

[Willie Oleson]

I like alotti Lance!

 

[Grant Jennings]

If you want to see a pornstache look no further than Richard in "The Vintage Years".