Dallas TNT - "Forgiveness"

[stevew]

Thanks @stevew it wasn't easy to come up with a way to explain Frank. I mean that plot totally clashed with what we saw on the original show and when they realized it wasn't working it felt like they took the easy way out to get rid of the character as fast as possible instead of coming up with a more plausible explaination.

But yeah the Barnes family sure has had their share of sadness.

*

Christopher felt emotionally exhausted when he returned home that afternoon. The meeting with his mother had gone way above expectation but it had also left a lot to think about. He had found out today that his mother hadn’t abandoned him, she had been kidnapped and she had raised the daughter of her kidnapper. It didn’t make any sense and trying to take it all in had exhausted him. It had really been a lot to swallow at once. What was even worse was that his mother wanted him to get to know Josephine. The girl was not his sister, but since Pam had raised her as her own child she expected him to treat her like if she was. It was a tall order and Christopher didn’t know how to talk to the girl. He didn’t know her of course, but since she was biologically John Ross sister his gut feeling told him that she couldn’t be trusted.

Elena looked up from her broidery when Christopher returned. She was busy making a pillow for her baby. “Hi Christopher, how did it go with your mother today?”

“It went okay.”

“Good,” Elena said. “So where has she been all these years?”

“In Abu Dhabi,” Christopher said. “She didn’t really leave me though.”

Elena raised an eyebrow, “Meaning?”

“She said she was kidnapped by Katherine,” Christopher said.

“That makes more sense,” Elena sighed. “Still hasn’t your aunt been dead for years?”

“She has,” Christopher confirmed.

“So if her kidnapper was dead, how come she didn’t return to you and Bobby?”

Christopher sighed heavily, “She said she lost her memory after a boating accident!"

“And you believe her?”

“I guess I have to,” Christopher said, shrugging his shoulders. “We decided to start over. She asked for my forgiveness.”

“Good, so did you?”

“I’m still working on it,” Christopher sighed. “It’s not easy to do but seeing her today after all these years has at least helped me get rid of my anger. I still think it’s unfair how my mom was taken from me and it hurts to know that she raised Katherine’s daughter instead of me. But at least now I know that she never really abandoned us. It was just dad who was conned into believing that she had. Sort of like when John Ross’ e-mail broke us apart, you know?”

“I know,” Elena sighed. “So who sent the letter to your dad?”

“Katherine,” Christopher said accusingly. “Mom thinks she never would have succeeded if she hadn’t been in that horrible accident.”

“So in a way the person driving that truck is responsible for separating you and your mother?”

“That’s one way of looking at it,” Christopher said as he pondered that for a moment. “My mom is convinced that was an accident. But I’m starting to think that maybe it wasn’t.”

“You think Katherine arranged that too?”

“I think it’s possible,” Christopher admitted. “I mean she did arrange everything else. You know what I think I’m gonna have Bum look into that accident for me.”

“To see if it really was an accident, you mean?”

“Yeah I wanna know who was responsible for that truck,” Christopher said and Elena sighed, since she had thought that now when Christopher had made up with his mother he would be able to let go of the hurt from his childhood. But it seemed like he was looking for vengeance instead and Elena knew from past experience that it never really ended well.

Sorry you made a mistake. It was not John Ross’s email that broke up Elena and Christopher as they accused him, it Turned out that it was Pamela who sent the phony email.

I also don’t think Bum would be for hire for Christopher. He was more than a hired hand for JR, he was his friend. And I don’t see him doing anything to help Chris or Bobby beyond that which JR would have instructed. Just my opinion, though.

 

[Karin Schill]

Thanks for the feedback @stevew
I think I watched that scene between Rebecca & Christopher at the BBQ where she confessed to writing the email but said that John Ross made her do it. So hence Christopher and Elena knew that it was really John Ross who was behind it. At least that was my interpretation of it. John Ross tried to blackmail Pamela at that point but she chose to come clean to Christopher instead since she couldn't nail that politician's son with the drinking problem or whatever it was he wanted her to do.

The details escapes me, but I have watched season one of Dallas TNT the most times, so I remember it better than the later seasons!

I think Bum would be on John Ross's side if there was a conflict between him and Christopher. But if Christopher would ask him to check out something else he would help him and Bobby too.

Anyway I am sorry about the lack of update in the past few days but the board has been down every time I've tried to post.

*

Pam was standing in the kitchen making a salad for dinner when her daughter Josephine came home that evening. Hearing the key in the door she called out, “Josephine, is that you?”

“Yes mom, where are you?”

“In the kitchen,” Pam called back and a moment later Josephine walked into the room with a smile on her face.

Seeing that her mother was making dinner she offered, “So is there anything I could do?”

“No dinner’s almost done,” Pamela said, as she kept chopping some tomatoes with a kitchen knife. “So did you have a good time with John Ross and Pamela Rebecca?”

Josephine looked surprised, “How did you know Pamela was with us?”

“Just a lucky guess,” Pam said coyly. “So did you like her?”

“Yeah,” Josephine said, picking up a carrot to snack on, “She was alright, a little pampered maybe but so am I so we hit it off just fine.”

“I’m glad,” Pam smiled. “You do know she’s your cousin?”

“Yeah we established that,” Josephine said. “It’s strange how we’re the same age and yet we’ve never met before now.”

“I know,” Pam said wistfully. “If things had been different I’m sure you would have grown up together.”

“I think I would have liked that,” Josephine said.

“So would I,” Pam said regretfully.

“They would like to meet you though,” Josephine said and Pam froze in her movement, as she wondered for a moment if Josephine was referring to the Ewing family, which meant that she’d get to meet Bobby again.

“Who?” Pam asked.

“John Ross and Pamela,” Josephine clarified to her disappointment.

“I see,” Pam said, as she tried to be casual about it, “Did they say why?”

Josephine shifted a little, since she was well aware of her brother’s ulterior motif, but fearing that her mother wouldn’t come if she told her she dodged the question, “Like you said, Pamela’s your niece so does she really have to have a reason?”

“No I guess not,” Pam said. “Like you said, we are family so it makes sense for them to want to get to know me.”

“Yeah,” Josephine nodded.

“I must admit that I have been avoiding John Ross though,” Pam sighed.

“I’ve noticed,” Josephine said. “Wanna tell me how come?”

“No good reason, I guess I’m just a little embarrassed about our first meeting,” Pam sighed. “I mean after all the boy used to be my nephew by marriage so I should have recognized him.”

“Don’t be so hard on yourself mom,” Josephine said. “After all he was just a boy of 8 when you left Dallas and he’s a grown man now so it’s not certain you would have recognized him even if you hadn’t lost your memories.”

“No but I would have remembered him,” Pamela sighed, as the memories from when John Ross first came to seek her and Josephine out in Abu Dhabi came flooding back to her.

The sun was still shining over the Persian Gulf and so far there was no signs of the dust storm that the weather forecast had predicted would blow in from the Saudi Arabia later that evening. Looking out over the blue water, while she was sitting out on the terrace of her villa, Pamela Greco was basking in the sun. She may not know who her parents had been or where she had come from but on days like this it didn’t matter. If anything not having a past had taught her to live life to the fullest and just live in the present, taking it one day at the time. So that’s what she had been doing for the past 25 years. By now she’d reconciled with the fact that her memories would never come back to her and she was fine with it. She didn’t need to know who she had been before she’d come to Abu Dhabi since to her it felt like her life had begun the day she woke up with amnesia.

If it was one thing she regretted though it was the fact that she wasn’t able to tell Josephine who her biological father had been. She had obviously been married before Leone and that marriage had blessed her with her beautiful daughter. But she had no memory of it. She didn’t know if her marriage had been better or worse than the marriage she and Leone had shared. But in her mind she really doubted it could have been any better, since Leone had given her everything that a man could possibly give a woman. A beautiful home, lavish gifts, attention and love. He had also been the most wonderful father to Josephine, who had never missed her real father, even though she had always known that Leone had adopted her. But yeah her life in Abu Dhabi had been a good one so Pam had not missed her past life at all. Besides she suspected that something bad must have happened in it to make her lose her memories in the first place and at this point in her life she had no desire to find out what that was. But unfortunately for Pam, today was the day that she’d be confronted with her past life in a way that made it impossible for her to ignore it.

“Hi aunt Pam,” a voice said and Pam opened her eyes and saw a young man standing before her. He had brown hair and a mischievous look in his blue green eyes. He was handsome, in his 30s and judging from his accent, he was an American.

His voice startled Pam, who got up from the chair and pulled on a robe, “What are you doing here?”She asked testily, as she thought the stranger might molest her, “Get out of my property before I call the police!”

“Whoa!” John Ross held up both hands, “Now calm down there’s no reason to over react here. I’m simply stopping by to say hello to my family.”

“Family?” Pam repeated.

“Yeah what’s the matter aunt Pam, don’t you recognize me?”

Hearing the stranger claiming that she was his aunt made Pam’s head spin, as she wondered if this man was pulling her leg or if he might be a link to her past. Since she wasn’t sure which one it was, she simply shook her head, “No, who are you?”

“John Ross Ewing III,” the man replied, as he reached out his hand to her.

Hearing that name did ring a bell, so she took his hand and shook it saying, “Pamela Greco. So you think I’m your aunt?”

“I don’t think, I know,” John Ross replied self-assured.

“How can you be so sure?” Pamela asked, as she narrowed her eyes suspiciously, “I mean could it be that you are mistaken?”

“Could be, but I doubt it. I know I haven’t seen you since I was 8 but you do remind me of the lady who used to be married to my uncle Bobby.”

“Bobby?” Pam repeated, as the name did have a familiar ring to it.

“Yeah you do remember your husband don’t you?”

Not wanting to admit that she’d lost her memories Pam dodged the question, “How do I know that you’re not an imposter?”

“I figured you might ask me this so I brought some proof,” John Ross said and picked up his phone and started to scroll until the picture he wanted showed up, “Here, have a look and tell me what you think.”

Pam looked at his phone and her eyes widened at what she saw, because she was looking at the picture of a family, sitting out by a pool. The man had dark hair and was handsome, the little boy looked happy and the woman looked like a younger version of herself, “But that’s me!”

“Yeah with Bobby and Christopher, about a year before the accident,” John Ross told her.

“You know about the boating accident?”

“Yes but I was referring to the car crash,” John Ross told her.

“Oh,” Pam made a face, as the pieces started to fit. Apparently she’d been married and in a car crash. Looking at the picture again it suddenly hit her that Josephine was nowhere to be found in the picture. Instead there was a little boy. Pointing to the boy she asked in a trembling voice, “So is that my son?”

“Yes of course. Surely you must remember Christopher?” John Ross said. “I mean he’s your son!”

Hearing that made Pam feel emotional, since apparently she had a son out there. Another child who she hadn’t been able to raise.“And Josephine?”

“Funny you should bring her up, since I’m actually here to see her,” John Ross said.

“You know my daughter?” Pam asked.

“No but I figured it was about time I did, considering that she’s my sister,” John Ross said.

“You’re Christopher?” Pam asked.

“No John Ross,” John Ross corrected her in an annoyed tone of voice. “Christopher’s my cousin.”

“I’m sorry I just assumed. I mean you said that Josephine’s your sister...”

“Well yeah, you see your sister Katherine had an affair with my dad and nine months later Josephine Rebecca Wentworth came into this world and...”

“No you’re lying, Josephine’s my daughter,” Pam cut him off, shaking her head.

“Sorry lady but no Josephine’s the daughter of Katherine Wentworth and JR Ewing!”

“Oh My God!” Josephine gasped, as she’d just stepped out on the terrace in time to overhear the last part of their conversation. John Ross then proceeded with picking up a piece of paper from his pocket that he handed to Pam. Looking at it Pamela felt like someone had stabbed her in her heart. Because according to Josephine’s birth certificate the man was right. Josephine was not her daughter, she was the daughter of the man she despised. She had spent all these years raising JR’s daughter. Learning the truth was too much for her and the shock rocked her to the very core of her being as her whole world was turned upside down. It was like someone had opened a flood gate to her past and all the memories from a life she’d forgotten all about came crashing down over her. Bobby, Christopher, JR, Cliff, Katherine, Rebecca and Digger. She suddenly remembered them all and knowing that she’d spent all these years raising JR’s daughter was enough to give her a mind splitting headache worse than any migraine. Yes for the first time in 25 years Pamela Barnes Ewing Greco knew exactly who she was and it hurt like hell...

“Mom, are you okay?” Josephine’s worried voice brought her out of the past and into the present and looking down at her throbbing finger she could see that she’d cut herself on the knife.

“Yeah, it’s just a small cut, I’ll be fine,” Pam said, as she put the knife in the sink and Josephine ran to get the first aid kit.

“Still you need to stop the bleeding,” Josephine said, as she handed her mother a piece of cotton from the first aid kit she’d gotten. “Here let me help you.”

“No it’s okay I’ve got it,” Pam said, she pressed the cotton to her finger.

“No it’s not okay. What were you thinking of cutting yourself like that?” Josephine asked in a worried tone of voice. “It’s not like you to be that careless in the kitchen.”

“I know,” Pam sighed, as she reluctantly let Josephine help her put a band aid on her finger. “Actually I was thinking about when John Ross first came to see us at home.”

“Oh,” Josephine made a face. “Yeah I can see why that would be distracting. I sure was shocked about what he told us.”

“You and me both,” Pam sighed. “Anyway I’ll meet with John Ross and Pamela on one condition.”

“What’s that?”

“That you’ll meet your other brother too,” Pam said.

“You mean James?” Josephine didn’t get it. “Why would I want to meet him?”

“No, not James,” Pam shook her head. “I meant my son, Christopher.”

“Oh,” Josephine made a face. “But I thought he wasn’t a part of your life anymore.”

“He will be from now on,” Pam smiled. “You see he came to see me today and he’s forgiven me for leaving him so we’re good.”

“Really?” Josephine asked surprised, as she tried to hide a grimace.

“Yeah so naturally I hope you will make an effort to get to know him too.”

“Well in that case, I’ll do my best,” Josephine promised, as she faked a smile, since she was not pleased with the news at all. It wasn’t just that she didn’t want to share her mother with Christopher. No what really bothered her was that she suspected that he might become a stumbling block to her and John Ross master plan to take over Ewing Global.

 

[stevew]

Thanks for the feedback @stevew
I think I watched that scene between Rebecca & Christopher at the BBQ where she confessed to writing the email but said that John Ross made her do it. So hence Christopher and Elena knew that it was really John Ross who was behind it. At least that was my interpretation of it. John Ross tried to blackmail Pamela at that point but she chose to come clean to Christopher instead since she couldn't nail that politician's son with the drinking problem or whatever it was he wanted her to do.

The details escapes me, but I have watched season one of Dallas TNT the most times, so I remember it better than the later seasons!

I think Bum would be on John Ross's side if there was a conflict between him and Christopher. But if Christopher would ask him to check out something else he would help him and Bobby too.

Anyway I am sorry about the lack of update in the past few days but the board has been down every time I've tried to post.

*

Pam was standing in the kitchen making a salad for dinner when her daughter Josephine came home that evening. Hearing the key in the door she called out, “Josephine, is that you?”

“Yes mom, where are you?”

“In the kitchen,” Pam called back and a moment later Josephine walked into the room with a smile on her face.

Seeing that her mother was making dinner she offered, “So is there anything I could do?”

“No dinner’s almost done,” Pamela said, as she kept chopping some tomatoes with a kitchen knife. “So did you have a good time with John Ross and Pamela Rebecca?”

Josephine looked surprised, “How did you know Pamela was with us?”

“Just a lucky guess,” Pam said coyly. “So did you like her?”

“Yeah,” Josephine said, picking up a carrot to snack on, “She was alright, a little pampered maybe but so am I so we hit it off just fine.”

“I’m glad,” Pam smiled. “You do know she’s your cousin?”

“Yeah we established that,” Josephine said. “It’s strange how we’re the same age and yet we’ve never met before now.”

“I know,” Pam said wistfully. “If things had been different I’m sure you would have grown up together.”

“I think I would have liked that,” Josephine said.

“So would I,” Pam said regretfully.

“They would like to meet you though,” Josephine said and Pam froze in her movement, as she wondered for a moment if Josephine was referring to the Ewing family, which meant that she’d get to meet Bobby again.

“Who?” Pam asked.

“John Ross and Pamela,” Josephine clarified to her disappointment.

“I see,” Pam said, as she tried to be casual about it, “Did they say why?”

Josephine shifted a little, since she was well aware of her brother’s ulterior motif, but fearing that her mother wouldn’t come if she told her she dodged the question, “Like you said, Pamela’s your niece so does she really have to have a reason?”

“No I guess not,” Pam said. “Like you said, we are family so it makes sense for them to want to get to know me.”

“Yeah,” Josephine nodded.

“I must admit that I have been avoiding John Ross though,” Pam sighed.

“I’ve noticed,” Josephine said. “Wanna tell me how come?”

“No good reason, I guess I’m just a little embarrassed about our first meeting,” Pam sighed. “I mean after all the boy used to be my nephew by marriage so I should have recognized him.”

“Don’t be so hard on yourself mom,” Josephine said. “After all he was just a boy of 8 when you left Dallas and he’s a grown man now so it’s not certain you would have recognized him even if you hadn’t lost your memories.”

“No but I would have remembered him,” Pamela sighed, as the memories from when John Ross first came to seek her and Josephine out in Abu Dhabi came flooding back to her.

The sun was still shining over the Persian Gulf and so far there was no signs of the dust storm that the weather forecast had predicted would blow in from the Saudi Arabia later that evening. Looking out over the blue water, while she was sitting out on the terrace of her villa, Pamela Greco was basking in the sun. She may not know who her parents had been or where she had come from but on days like this it didn’t matter. If anything not having a past had taught her to live life to the fullest and just live in the present, taking it one day at the time. So that’s what she had been doing for the past 25 years. By now she’d reconciled with the fact that her memories would never come back to her and she was fine with it. She didn’t need to know who she had been before she’d come to Abu Dhabi since to her it felt like her life had begun the day she woke up with amnesia.

If it was one thing she regretted though it was the fact that she wasn’t able to tell Josephine who her biological father had been. She had obviously been married before Leone and that marriage had blessed her with her beautiful daughter. But she had no memory of it. She didn’t know if her marriage had been better or worse than the marriage she and Leone had shared. But in her mind she really doubted it could have been any better, since Leone had given her everything that a man could possibly give a woman. A beautiful home, lavish gifts, attention and love. He had also been the most wonderful father to Josephine, who had never missed her real father, even though she had always known that Leone had adopted her. But yeah her life in Abu Dhabi had been a good one so Pam had not missed her past life at all. Besides she suspected that something bad must have happened in it to make her lose her memories in the first place and at this point in her life she had no desire to find out what that was. But unfortunately for Pam, today was the day that she’d be confronted with her past life in a way that made it impossible for her to ignore it.

“Hi aunt Pam,” a voice said and Pam opened her eyes and saw a young man standing before her. He had brown hair and a mischievous look in his blue green eyes. He was handsome, in his 30s and judging from his accent, he was an American.

His voice startled Pam, who got up from the chair and pulled on a robe, “What are you doing here?”She asked testily, as she thought the stranger might molest her, “Get out of my property before I call the police!”

“Whoa!” John Ross held up both hands, “Now calm down there’s no reason to over react here. I’m simply stopping by to say hello to my family.”

“Family?” Pam repeated.

“Yeah what’s the matter aunt Pam, don’t you recognize me?”

Hearing the stranger claiming that she was his aunt made Pam’s head spin, as she wondered if this man was pulling her leg or if he might be a link to her past. Since she wasn’t sure which one it was, she simply shook her head, “No, who are you?”

“John Ross Ewing III,” the man replied, as he reached out his hand to her.

Hearing that name did ring a bell, so she took his hand and shook it saying, “Pamela Greco. So you think I’m your aunt?”

“I don’t think, I know,” John Ross replied self-assured.

“How can you be so sure?” Pamela asked, as she narrowed her eyes suspiciously, “I mean could it be that you are mistaken?”

“Could be, but I doubt it. I know I haven’t seen you since I was 8 but you do remind me of the lady who used to be married to my uncle Bobby.”

“Bobby?” Pam repeated, as the name did have a familiar ring to it.

“Yeah you do remember your husband don’t you?”

Not wanting to admit that she’d lost her memories Pam dodged the question, “How do I know that you’re not an imposter?”

“I figured you might ask me this so I brought some proof,” John Ross said and picked up his phone and started to scroll until the picture he wanted showed up, “Here, have a look and tell me what you think.”

Pam looked at his phone and her eyes widened at what she saw, because she was looking at the picture of a family, sitting out by a pool. The man had dark hair and was handsome, the little boy looked happy and the woman looked like a younger version of herself, “But that’s me!”

“Yeah with Bobby and Christopher, about a year before the accident,” John Ross told her.

“You know about the boating accident?”

“Yes but I was referring to the car crash,” John Ross told her.

“Oh,” Pam made a face, as the pieces started to fit. Apparently she’d been married and in a car crash. Looking at the picture again it suddenly hit her that Josephine was nowhere to be found in the picture. Instead there was a little boy. Pointing to the boy she asked in a trembling voice, “So is that my son?”

“Yes of course. Surely you must remember Christopher?” John Ross said. “I mean he’s your son!”

Hearing that made Pam feel emotional, since apparently she had a son out there. Another child who she hadn’t been able to raise.“And Josephine?”

“Funny you should bring her up, since I’m actually here to see her,” John Ross said.

“You know my daughter?” Pam asked.

“No but I figured it was about time I did, considering that she’s my sister,” John Ross said.

“You’re Christopher?” Pam asked.

“No John Ross,” John Ross corrected her in an annoyed tone of voice. “Christopher’s my cousin.”

“I’m sorry I just assumed. I mean you said that Josephine’s your sister...”

“Well yeah, you see your sister Katherine had an affair with my dad and nine months later Josephine Rebecca Wentworth came into this world and...”

“No you’re lying, Josephine’s my daughter,” Pam cut him off, shaking her head.

“Sorry lady but no Josephine’s the daughter of Katherine Wentworth and JR Ewing!”

“Oh My God!” Josephine gasped, as she’d just stepped out on the terrace in time to overhear the last part of their conversation. John Ross then proceeded with picking up a piece of paper from his pocket that he handed to Pam. Looking at it Pamela felt like someone had stabbed her in her heart. Because according to Josephine’s birth certificate the man was right. Josephine was not her daughter, she was the daughter of the man she despised. She had spent all these years raising JR’s daughter. Learning the truth was too much for her and the shock rocked her to the very core of her being as her whole world was turned upside down. It was like someone had opened a flood gate to her past and all the memories from a life she’d forgotten all about came crashing down over her. Bobby, Christopher, JR, Cliff, Katherine, Rebecca and Digger. She suddenly remembered them all and knowing that she’d spent all these years raising JR’s daughter was enough to give her a mind splitting headache worse than any migraine. Yes for the first time in 25 years Pamela Barnes Ewing Greco knew exactly who she was and it hurt like hell...

“Mom, are you okay?” Josephine’s worried voice brought her out of the past and into the present and looking down at her throbbing finger she could see that she’d cut herself on the knife.

“Yeah, it’s just a small cut, I’ll be fine,” Pam said, as she put the knife in the sink and Josephine ran to get the first aid kit.

“Still you need to stop the bleeding,” Josephine said, as she handed her mother a piece of cotton from the first aid kit she’d gotten. “Here let me help you.”

“No it’s okay I’ve got it,” Pam said, she pressed the cotton to her finger.

“No it’s not okay. What were you thinking of cutting yourself like that?” Josephine asked in a worried tone of voice. “It’s not like you to be that careless in the kitchen.”

“I know,” Pam sighed, as she reluctantly let Josephine help her put a band aid on her finger. “Actually I was thinking about when John Ross first came to see us at home.”

“Oh,” Josephine made a face. “Yeah I can see why that would be distracting. I sure was shocked about what he told us.”

“You and me both,” Pam sighed. “Anyway I’ll meet with John Ross and Pamela on one condition.”

“What’s that?”

“That you’ll meet your other brother too,” Pam said.

“You mean James?” Josephine didn’t get it. “Why would I want to meet him?”

“No, not James,” Pam shook her head. “I meant my son, Christopher.”

“Oh,” Josephine made a face. “But I thought he wasn’t a part of your life anymore.”

“He will be from now on,” Pam smiled. “You see he came to see me today and he’s forgiven me for leaving him so we’re good.”

“Really?” Josephine asked surprised, as she tried to hide a grimace.

“Yeah so naturally I hope you will make an effort to get to know him too.”

“Well in that case, I’ll do my best,” Josephine promised, as she faked a smile, since she was not pleased with the news at all. It wasn’t just that she didn’t want to share her mother with Christopher. No what really bothered her was that she suspected that he might become a stumbling block to her and John Ross master plan to take over Ewing Global.

Sorry I don’t remember it that way but I have not rewatched it. So in order for John Ross to put Pamela up to the letter, he knew it was Pamela all along? I’d say I’d rewatch it but over all I found it awful, so won’t. It was very confusing to say the least, but then they ignored so much of what we already knew it was bound to be.

Nice up date. Pam seems fragile, but then again I guess she wound.

 

[Karin Schill]

Thanks @stevew . I think I've probably watched the first season of Dallas TNT about three times all the way through and then I've also watched some episodes more times. It was the season I liked best. Probably because it still had JR!

Also it resembled the original Dallas more than the third season with the cartel and all.

Anyway yeah I did interpret it like that John Ross knew that Pamela wrote the letter all along since he put her up to it.

I guess it's fair to say that Pam was fragile in that update, as she had a shock. Getting her memories back was traumatic for her. She has since then had some time to come to terms with it and she's been reconciled with her brother and then he died. Now she's also been reconciled with her son. But there's still a lot of unresolved things between her and Bobby that is lingering on.

But tonight's update is all about Cliff & Afton.

*

Chapter six



Afton was sitting in the bath trying to relax from the water massage but no matter of how hard she tried she couldn’t find any peace of mind. The conversation with Pam earlier that afternoon had made her think about her lost son and it had opened up a wound inside of her heart that she thought had closed a long time ago. There was no such thing as getting over the loss of a child. It was not something you got over. But it was something that you learnt to live with and on a normal day the pain wasn’t this intense. But tonight it was worse than in a long time. Maybe it was the grief over Cliff that had made the loss of their son feel more raw than usual. It made her heart bleed and there was nobody there to comfort her. Sure Pam and Josephine were downstairs but Afton didn’t want to impose on their mother-daughter time. So she stayed up here in the master suite alone with the ghosts from her past.

She had been working at a club in Florida when he had found her. It had been close to eleven and she had just finished her gig of the night and gone backstage to change clothes when there had been a knock on the door to her loge. “Just a minute!” She had called out, as she pulled the sweater over her head and then corrected her hair. She then went to open the door and her face dropped, as he was the last person she had expected to see.


“Cliff!” She exclaimed.

“Hi Afton,” he smiled at her.

“What are you doing here?”

“I had to see you,” he replied.

“Why?” She crossed her arms. “I thought we’d said everything there was to say three years ago.”

“So did I but I can’t get you off my mind,” Cliff sighed. “I’ve missed you.”

Afton made a face as she so didn’t need to hear this, “Cliff...”

“No Afton, I’ve come a long way to see you. So can’t you at least have a drink with me and we can talk?”

“I can’t,” she said. “I have to get home to my daughter.”

“I understand, but you know how persistent I can be,” Cliff said. “If you won’t see me tonight, how about tomorrow?”

Afton sighed again before she looked at her watch, seeing that it wasn’t quite as late as she’d thought she relented, “No then it’s better we talk now. But I only have a few minutes.”

“Alright,” Cliff said before they walked out of the loge to find somewhere to sit. “So how have you been?”

“Fine, you?”

“Better now but the last couple of years have been a bit of a roller coaster,” Cliff said, as they sat down at the bar.

“Yeah I heard you left Ewing Oil and went on another crusade against the Ewings,” Afton said.

“I did,” Cliff admitted. “But the feud is over now and I won. JR Ewing is catatonic in some home and I am running Ewing Oil!”

But Afton didn't look happy to hear that. Instead she crossed her arms, “Am I supposed to think that’s a good thing?”

“I know you don’t,” Cliff said before he ordered drinks for them. “But it feels great to be a winner.”

“Yeah, yeah because winning is all that matters to Cliff Barnes,” Afton said sarcastically, as she wondered why she’d even agreed to this.

“That’s not true,” Cliff shook his head. “I might have succeeded in business but it doesn’t mean much without a family to share it with.”

“Cliff...”

“I know little Pammy is not mine but it doesn’t matter. I want you Afton. So you have a child since before?” Cliff paused, “I am sure I could love her like if she was my own.”Hearing that Afton shifted uncomfortably. “Don’t you think the child deserves to have a father?”

“She already has a father,” Afton insisted, as their drinks arrived.

“An absent one,” Cliff corrected her. “But he won’t provide for her. I could give her all the things that your ex-husband never gave her. A home, stability and love.”

“What do you know about love?”Afton said. “You married a woman for business.”

“I know,” Cliff hung his head low when he thought of Jamie, “It was a mistake. I should have married you a long time ago but I took you for granted,” Cliff sighed. “I guess I had to lose you to realize how much I love you. Since I do love you, you know?”

“I know but it doesn’t change anything. I don’t need you in my life. Me and my daughter are doing just fine without you, okay?” Afton said.

“You don’t love me, is that it?”

Afton knew she should say it but no matter of how hard she tried the lie wouldn’t leave her lips, “No that’s not it.”

“So then you do love me and that means I have a chance,” Cliff said.

“You’ve already used up all of your chances,” Afton said in a tired tone of voice.

“No, everything comes in threes and I’ve blown two of my chances. But you know what they say, the third time is the charm so if you’ll just give me one more I’m not gonna blow it this time.”

“I’m sorry Cliff but I can’t give you another chance when I don’t trust you.” Afton said. “I mean you’ve lied to me before so how can I be sure you won’t do it again?”

“So you’ve never lied to me then?”

“What are you getting at?” Afton’s face paled. “Has Van Buren talked to you?”

“No,” Cliff gave her a weird look. “What could we possibly have to talk about?”

“Nothing. I was just wondering if he’d tried to hit you up for money or something.”

“He hasn’t,” Cliff said. “Anyway what I tried to say before is that trust goes both ways in a relationship. So unless you can honestly tell me that you’ve never lied to me about anything you shouldn’t judge me.”

Knowing that she had in fact lied to him about the paternity of their daughter Afton sighed heavily, “Alright then, I’ll give you one last chance. But you better not blow it this time.”

“Thank you Afton, I won’t,” Cliff smiled at her. “I promise, I will do whatever it take to make you happy this time.”

“I believe it when I see it,” Afton muttered, as a part of her already had a feeling that she was going to live to regret the day that Cliff Barnes had ever reappeared into her life again...

The memories of her life together with Cliff was still weighing heavily on her mind as Afton got out of the bath. She pulled on a robe before she put up her wet hair in a towel and walked into the bedroom to get herself a drink. Afton had never been much for drinking but tonight she felt like she needed a drink to steady her nerves a bit. She walked over towards the bed that she’d once shared with Cliff when they were married. She sat down on it and took a sip of her drink before she put it down. She then walked over towards the other side of the room and pulled a drape. But it was not covering a window, since as it went aside it revealed a framed family portrait that had been hidden from view. The photo used to be on display in their bedroom during the happiest time of their marriage but after Jacob had died they had put a curtain before it, since it hurt too much to look at it. But they also couldn’t bring themselves to actually take down the photo from the wall. So the curtain had been the solution.

Looking at their smiling faces now made her feel melancholy as it reminded her of what a happy family they had been once upon a time.

Afton was sitting in bed, holding her son who was just a few days old. The baby was cooing contently in her arms and she just couldn’t stop looking at him. He was such a beautiful baby. She had just fed him though so he was getting sleepy. The door to the bedroom opened and Cliff and Pamela Rebecca walked into the room. “Hi mom, can I hold him now?”

“Not now Pamela, can’t you see he’s about to fall asleep,” Afton replied.

“But mom he is my baby brother and it’s been five days already. Don’t you think it’s about time I get to hold him?” Pamela objected.

“We’d better let her hold him now or she’s just gonna nag us until we let her,” Cliff said.

“Please mom, I promise I’ll be real careful,” Pamela said and seeing the hopeful expression in her daughter’s eyes Afton finally gave in.

“Alright you can hold him, if you sit next to me,” Afton said.

“Okay,” Pamela said and jumped up on the bed, she then sat next to Afton who gently handed her the baby with the words, “Careful now, make sure to support his head.”

“Don’t worry mom, I’m not gonna drop him,” Pamela said.

“There good, now you’re holding him,” Afton said, as Pamela did as she was told and supported his head.

“Wow for being so little, he sure is heavy!” Pamela remarked.

“I think he’s perfect,” Afton said.

“So do I,” Cliff said as he sat down next to Afton and put his arms around her shoulders. They exchanged a kiss and Pamela giggled delighted.

“So what are we gonna call him?”

Her parents looked at each other then they said two different names at the same time.

“Willard!”

“Alexander!”

“Afton you know I want my son to be named after my father,” Cliff said.

“Yeah but our daughter is named after your sister and mother so don’t you think it’s my turn to have a name from my family?”

“That’s not fair, you were the one who named our daughter after my sister and mother without even consulting me.”

“So are you saying you don’t like the name of Pamela Rebecca?”

“I love it, it’s just that I’ve always wanted my son to be named after my father. It’s important to me.”

“I know but I don’t like the name of Willard.”

“Would you prefer it if we call him Digger then?”

“No!” Afton wrinkled her nose. “Digger’s a horrible nickname for a cute little baby.”

“Well he won’t stay a baby forever. One day he’ll grow up and take over my company.”

“Hey dad! Are you forgetting about me?” Pamela said. “I wanna work at your company too and since I’m the oldest don’t you think I should run it?”

“Sorry sweetheart, maybe you can run it together with Willard,” Cliff said.

“He means Alexander,” Afton said.

“Why don’t we ask Pamela which name she prefers?” Cliff asked.

“Good idea, let Pammy decide,” Afton said. “Don’t you think Alexander has a great ring to it?”

“No surely Willard is better,” Cliff said.

“Actually...” Pamela looked from her mother to her father and knew that whichever name she’d pick one of them would be disappointed. So she took the easy way out. “I prefer Jacob!”

“Jacob?” Afton asked.

“But it’s not a family name,” Cliff objected.

“Still I sort of like it,” Afton said. “Jacob Barnes.”

“It does have a nice ring to it too,” Cliff said.

“Good so then it’s decide, he will be a Jacob,” Pamela smiled sweetly and her parents smiled too since at last they were all in agreement. Finally their son had a name so now they could baptize him and watch him grow up...

Afton couldn’t hold back the tears when she thought of her son. Having another child had been a dream come true and it had brought them closer together. The time when she’d been pregnant and later on when Jacob had been a baby had been the peak of their marriage. But sadly all good things had to come to an end sooner or later.

Afton was standing in the door as she was about to head out. But she had a hard time leaving her young son behind. Looking from the sleeping baby in her arms to her husband she asked, “Are you sure you’ll be okay tonight?”

“Yes,” Cliff reassured her. “You’ll go back to work. I can handle the kids.”

“But isn’t it too soon?” Afton asked. “I mean the baby’s only nine months so he still needs me and...”

“Yes he does, but he’s been fed and you said you wanted to wane him off the breast milk anyway.”

“I do but I still feel guilty for going back to work this soon,” Afton said.

“You have nothing to be guilty about,” Cliff said. “I mean other women go back to work after three months. You have been home for almost a year.”

“Yeah but other families are dependent upon two incomes and it’s not like we need the money my job brings in,” Afton said. “So maybe it would be better if I was a stay at home mom?”

“Fine by me if I thought that would make you happy,” Cliff said. “But I know you Afton and you love to sing so if you’ll give that up you’re gonna end up regretting it.”

“You’re right,” Afton sighed. “I do love to sing and I love you for being so supportive of my work.”

“But?”

“I still don’t want to leave my baby,” Afton said, as she hugged Jacob tightly and rejoiced in the feeling of holding the baby in her arms. His skin was so soft against her cheek and his little hand held on so tight around her finger. He clearly didn’t want her to leave either. “What if something happens to him and I am not here?”

“Afton honey, relax,” Cliff said. “Nothing’s gonna happen to Jacob. Now you go to work and let me and Pamela take care of him.”

“Yes mom, dad and I can take care of Jacob,” Pamela insisted. “Now hand him over to me.”

“You do know that if you’ll give her the baby she’s not gonna let me take care of him. She's gonna wanna do it all by herself,” Cliff said.

“I thought you didn’t mind when I change the diapers,” Pamela said.

“I don’t and I know he’s your baby brother and that you love him. But he’s my son so I want to help too, okay?”

“Okay dad,” Pamela agreed before a shadow fell over her face. “So who do you love more, him or me?”

“I love you both the same,” Cliff said. “But I’ve missed out on your first years, so I don’t wanna miss a thing when it comes to Jacob’s first years. I want to savior it all.”

“I’m sorry Cliff,” Afton apologized as she walked up to him and handed him their son. She then leant down and gave the baby a kiss on his forehead before she turned to her husband with misty eyes, “If I would have known what a great father and husband you’d turn out to be I wouldn’t have walked out on you all those years ago.”

“Thanks, but it’s water under the bridge now,” Cliff said. “What’s important is that you’re here now and that you, me, Pamela and Jacob are a family. I’ve gotten a second chance now and that means everything to me.”

“I know,” Afton said softly and she did since she had never been happier in her life.

The tears were running down her checks when she thought back on her life together with Cliff. He had kept his promise to her in the sense that he had made her truly happy. But he had also made her really miserable. It was funny as there was no in between with her and Cliff. They had either been really happy together or completely miserable. But yes they sure had been happy when Jacob was a baby. But then it had all fallen apart.

Cliff was sitting on their bed just staring ahead of him, as he was unable to move. Having already gotten dressed Afton walked up to him and said in a pleading tone of voice, “Please Cliff, you have to go to the funeral.”

“I can’t,” Cliff cried, “They are gonna bury my son and it’s all my fault.”

Afton sighed when she heard that. They had been through grief together before so it shouldn’t come as a surprise to her that he blamed himself, as he’d been the same way when his mother had died. Yet this was somehow worse than anything they had ever faced before since the loss of a child cut deeper than any other loss.

“It’s not your fault Jacob died,” Afton said with all the strength she could muster, but the tears were burning behind her eyelids.

“Yes it is,” Cliff blamed himself, “I am the one who carry the disease so I passed it on to our son.”

“Yes but we couldn’t know that would happen. I mean Pammy doesn’t have the disease.”

“Just because she doesn’t display any symptoms of it, that doesn’t mean that she’s cured of it. She’s still a carrier of the disease and so am I!”Cliff yelled angrily, it was like he was blaming God for giving him this godforsaken disease in the first place.

“Yes but since Pamela’s healthy we had every reason to believe that our next child would be healthy too,” Afton tried to reason with him in a small voice.

“Not necessarily, I mean my parents lost two out of three children,” Cliff said.

“That’s awful, poor Rebecca!” Afton said, as the tears spilled over and started running down her cheek. She had always been the strong one of them, the one who picked up Cliff when he was down, but this time she was hurting too much to deal with this. She had enough with her own grief.

Hearing his wife sob he finally looked up, “I’m sorry, but I wish we’d never had another child,” His words felt like a stab right through her heart.

“No,” Afton whispered in disbelief, “You can’t mean that.”

“I mean it alright,” Cliff said. “In fact we probably never should have gotten married either.”

“I’ve never regretted that,” Afton said softly.

“What’s wrong with you woman?”Cliff yelled at her. “Can’t you see that I am damned?” He exploded. “Everything I touch turn into dust.”

“No we’ve still got Pamela,” Afton reminded him. “I am hurting just as much as you are Cliff. When Jacob died I felt like I wanted to die. But for our daughter’s sake we have to go on living. Because she needs us Cliff.”

Cliff looked at her with the tears running down his cheeks too, “Alright, let’s go to that funeral. But after today I don’t want anything in the house that reminds me of him. If we are gonna go on living we have to forget he ever existed.”

“But how could we do that?” Afton asked. “I mean he was our son and we loved him.”

“We have to or we’re not gonna make it,” Cliff said. “It’s always gonna eat us up inside. So we’ll have to forget.” Cliff had told her and although she found it hard to do she had followed his advice and banished all thoughts of Jacob from her mind...

Until today that was since tonight she couldn’t think of anything but Jacob and what could have been and that’s when she felt like life was not fair. Since surely no parent should ever outlive their child. Yet that was what she and Cliff had done and thinking about Jacob now she couldn’t help but wondering who he’d been today if he’d gotten to live. Jacob would have been 20 years old now and probably away at college. He would have been handsome just like his father had been. But sadly her son had never grown out of his diapers and now instead of mourning the death of his father, his soul was finally reunited with him instead. Cliff was with Jacob now and all she had left of her family was her daughter. Thinking about Pamela Rebecca and the way they had left things last night Afton reached for her cell phone. She picked it up and thought of dialing Pamela. But since she didn’t want her daughter to hear her crying on the other end of the line she opted for sending her a text message instead.

“I miss you. Can we please have lunch tomorrow and talk about what happened? Love mom.” Afton pressed send. There now was the first step towards a reconciliation taken. She knew her daughter was angry but since she was all she had left she hoped that Pamela Rebecca could find it in her heart to forgive her for keeping her father’s illness a secret from her. They just had to find a way to get passed this since she just couldn’t imagine living the rest of her life without her daughter being a part of it.

 

[Karin Schill]

The next morning were Bobby and Ann having breakfast out on the patio. The sun was shining down from a clear blue sky and it looked like it would be another great day and yet there was a tension lingering in the air between them. They had never been great at communicating and once again they were keeping secrets from each other. It was noticeable in the things they didn’t say and it made the silence between them uncomfortable. Sensing that something was wrong Bobby tried to get Ann to open up to him, “Are you sure nothing happened when you saw Emma yesterday?”

Ann flinched, since she was well aware of what had happened but knowing that she couldn’t tell her husband about Emma’s secret she just said in a chilly voice, “No nothing happened.”

“Strange, since I could have sworn that something is bothering you,” Bobby said.

“Why do you say that?”

“No reason, it’s just something in your mood,” Bobby said. “Harris didn’t try to make a move on you again now, did he?”

“No,” Ann said in an angry voice. “He knows that I am not interested.”

“Good,” Bobby said. “So how is Emma?”

“Not great, Harris and I have talked about bringing her to see a psychiatrist,” Ann told him.

“You really think that’s necessary?”

“Yeah after what happened to her in Mexico it really is.”

“What do you mean?” Bobby's eyes narrowed. “What happened to Emma in Mexico?”

“Nothing,” Ann said too quickly before she smoothed over her slip of the tongue, “I just meant that the kidnapping was very traumatic for Emma. So she could benefit from talking to a professional about it.”

“Okay,” Bobby nodded, even though he couldn’t shake the feeling that there was more to it than that. Yet since Ann didn’t volunteer any more information he decided to let it go for now.

They went silent again. It wasn’t a comfortable silence either as there was tension lingering in the air between them. So when Christopher came walking up to the house from the cottage where he and Elena lived he was a welcomed sight. “Good morning Christopher,” Ann greeted him with a smile.

“Morning son,” Bobby said, as Christopher sat down at the breakfast table. “So what happened to you yesterday?”

“What about yesterday?” Christopher asked, as he grabbed a sandwich to eat.

“You had promised to help me brand some cattle but...”

“Oh I’m sorry dad but I completely forgot about it,” Christopher apologized.

“So where were you?”

“Um,” Christopher looked down for a moment before he smiled, “actually I went to see my mother.”

“You saw Pam?” Bobby’s cheek dropped, as he hadn’t expected that.

“Yeah, if you don’t mind I would need to talk to you about something she said,” Christopher gave Ann a look. “Alone.”

“I guess that’s my cue to leave,” Ann said.

“No, you don’t have to,” Bobby said before he turned to Christopher, “Anything you have to say about your mother you can say in front of Ann!”

“Thanks Bobby, but that’s not necessary,” Ann said as she got up from the table. “I can tell when I’m not wanted and besides I need to go see Emma anyway.”

Bobby looked stunned, as he hadn’t expected his wife to contradict him. But knowing that he couldn’t really insist after that he just nodded defeated. “Okay. See ya tonight then.”

“Yeah tonight,” Ann said before she walked off.

Once when they were alone together Bobby turned to Christopher and asked, “So how’s Pam?”

“As well as can be expected considering that her brother just died,” Christopher said, before adding, “She’s staying at Uncle Cliff’s house in case you want to go see her.”

“I don’t,” Bobby lied, since a part of him had been inching to see her ever since she’d up and left the funeral without a word. But since he had promised Ann not to he couldn’t follow that impulse.

“I thought you wanted to get some answers,” Christopher said.

“I’m sure you can fill me in,” Bobby said callously.

“I guess,” Christopher shrugged his shoulders, “but I really think you should go see her. I mean you need to forgive her so you can let go of all that anger and bitterness that you’ve got bottled up inside of you.”

“I’m not angry or bitter,” Bobby said testily.

“Yes you are dad,” Christopher insisted. “You’ve been that way for so long now that maybe you don’t even think of it anymore. But I’ve noticed a change in you and...”

“I don’t think I could forgive Pam for leaving us even if I wanted to,” Bobby interrupted his son, indicating that the topic was closed for discussion.

“I didn’t think I could either but I have forgiven her and it feels great,” Christopher smiled. “I’ve got my mother back.”

Bobby gave him a skeptical look, “Just like that?”

“Yeah we talked and once I understood why she’d left us I was able to forgive her,” Christopher said. “I wish you could forgive her too. If not for your sake do it for me. I want my parents to be able to talk to each other.”

“I’m sorry Christopher but that’s not gonna happen,” Bobby said. “Your mother and I are divorced and I am married to Ann now. So your mother being here changes nothing as far as I am concerned.”

“So you really don’t care that mom was kidnapped from the hospital?” Christopher said angrily and upon hearing that Bobby felt like someone had punched him in the stomach.

“Is that what she told you?” He asked in a strained voice.

“Yes,” Christopher nodded, “She said that she never wanted to leave us but that her sister Katherine made her do it.”

Upon hearing Katherine’s name the blood in Bobby’s veins froze to ice, “Katherine was behind this?”

“Yes that’s what mom said. You don’t think she was lying about it, do you?” Christopher asked and his father went silent as he thought it over. Being tired of waiting Christopher pressed on, “Because Katherine was capable of kidnapping, wasn’t she?”

“I think so,” Bobby grimaced. “I mean she did try to kill me twice and when your mom was in the hospital I found Katherine there visiting her. So I told her to leave us alone or I’d have her arrested.”

“See she had the opportunity to kidnap mom!”

“Not really. I had an armed guard posted outside of your mother’s room after that.”

“Well in that case he wasn’t worth your money!” Christopher said. “Since mom told me that Katherine kidnapped her. She was waiting for you to rescue her for a year after that but you never even bothered looking for her. You just gave up on her!”

“But that was because of that letter,” Bobby said defensively.

“Which letter?”

“Your mother wrote me a letter saying that if we loved her we shouldn’t look for her,” Bobby explained. “I only did what she asked me to do.”

“Katherine wrote that letter,” Christopher burst his bubble.

“Don’t be ridiculous, your mother wrote that letter,” Bobby said angrily since he didn’t want to believe that his son could be right about something as important as that.

“You still have it?”

“I guess it’s around somewhere,” Bobby sighed.

“Then I want to have a look at it. Also how can you be so sure that Katherine didn’t write it?” Christopher asked. “I mean didn’t she write a letter once before breaking you two up?”

“What are you getting at?”

“The first time you divorced mom, didn’t Katherine read you a letter then?”

“Christopher we’re talking about something that happened over 30 years ago, you can’t expect me to remember every detail.”

“You’d remember it if it was important,” Christopher insisted. “Please dad it’s important to me. Did or didn’t Katherine read you a letter before you divorced mom?”

Bobby sighed, as he was forced to admit it, “She did read me a letter from Pam to her lawyer.”

“And?”

“It said she wanted me to let her go, so I did,” Bobby looked pained as the memories came flooding back to him.

It had been a beautiful day at Thanksgiving Square in downtown Dallas. But observing a mother reading a book to her child Bobby had felt miserable, since it reminded him of everything that he stood to lose, Pam and Christopher. The letter that Katherine had read to him was weighing heavily on his mind and he knew that he had to let them go, even though he didn’t want to. He was so wrapped up in his feelings that he barely noticed that she’d appeared until she tapped him on the shoulder, “Hi, she smiled at him.

He looked up and saw that she looked really beautiful, her auburn hair was blowing in the wind and she was dressed in a white summer’s dress. “Hi,” he told her as she sat down next to him.

“I haven’t been here in a long time,” she looked around taking in the place before her eyes met his.

“Come to think of it neither have I.”

“Liz and Jackie and I used to come here,” she raised her eyebrows at him, “sometimes when I was still working at the store.”

“I know I used to meet you here too, remember?”

“Seems like two lifetimes ago,” she said wistfully.

“Yeah,” he sighed, looking down, as he was reminded of that she thought they were ancient history already.

She looked down too and they went painfully silent, “It’s amazing how different we are you and me, it’s odd how people change.”

He looked up at her then, insisting, “I don’t think people change so much really Pam, it’s feelings that change.”

She looked at him then, meeting his hazel eyes again, “Bobby I called you because I think we have to talk about our marriage.”

“Yes we do,” he nodded in agreement before he looked down and swallowed hard.

“You know the last couple of months have been difficult, they’ve been hard for both of us, you know as young as Christopher is he’s felt it too,” she said and he kept looking away, not wanting to meet her eyes anymore, as the sadness he saw in them mirrored his own, “I’ve asked myself a thousand times if I was right to leave you,” her voice went soft, almost vulnerable, “and what we should do about it now. But I could just never come to any decision,” she said before she looked down again, “and then a couple of days ago my attorney called and reminded me that we have a court date coming up.”

“Pam don’t go on,” he turned to her then, stopping her from saying anything more. “I have something I wanna say, please let me say it.”

“Alright,” she gave him a half-smile.

“Sometimes when...when people fight so hard for something, that means a whole lot to them,” he looked away again and his eyes blinked several times as he tried to get the words out but it was not easy for him, “they,” he hesitated, “they seem to lose track of the truth,” he licked his lips ever so slightly, “and ever since you left me I’ve done everything I can to try and get you to come back. I was ready to give up the ranch, Ewing oil,” she bit her lip, as she listened to the determination in his voice, “ anything and then I realized that that’s just not something that can work.”

“Bobby...”she said softly.

“No let me go on I’ve thought a lot about this, especially in the last couple of days,” he said in a strained voice, since he knew that if he didn’t say it now he never would. “I’ve finally realized that, what I’ve been fighting so hard to trying to keep,” he shook his head, “just doesn’t exist anymore. We have feelings for one another, wonderful feelings but,” he paused, as he tried to find the right words, “they are just yesterday’s memories.”

She looked hurt at him, as his words had taken her by surprise, “Yesterday’s memories?” She frowned, clearly not agreeing with him.

“That’s right,” he looked up instead of at her, “just like the hours that we spent right here at this square.”

She looked at him in disbelief before she objected, “No they are more than that.”

“Alright maybe, maybe a little more, I don’t know,” he said in a strained voice before insisting, “But I do know they are not the same,” he swallowed, “and Pam a lot has changed between us,” he gave her an accusing glance, as if he thought it was her fault that things had changed. She noticed it and looked pained at him as he went on, “So before you tell me what’s on your mind. I,” he looked down and his voice went hoarse with emotions, ”I wanted to tell you that I,” he licked his lips, before he met her eyes again, “I’m letting you go. I won’t put pressure on you anymore,” seeing the pain in her eyes that mirrored his own he had to look away, “I won’t rush you anymore. I just don’t think it’s fair to either one of us...”

“Bobby...”

“It’s for the best Pam,” he nodded, thinking he was doing what she had wanted, “for both you and me,” he sighed heavily, throwing her a glance again but looking away immediately as he couldn’t stand to see how much his words had hurt her, “So I call my lawyer in the morning and he’ll contact yours. I just think it’s better that we both finally realize that it’s over.” She looked away and then she looked back at him with a tear running down her cheek. But he never saw it as he was staring straight ahead of him. He could hear her sobbing as she got up and walked away from him. His eyes spilled over with tears too, before he stood up and took a few steps after her, but she never looked back, if she had she would have noticed his tears too...

“So mom was right!”

Christopher’s voice brought him out of the past and into the present. “What?”

“Mom told me about the letter,” Christopher elaborated, “and since she was right about the letter that Katherine wrote and read to you before your first divorce I am willing to bet you that she didn’t write that second letter you received either!”

“Damn!” Bobby cursed, as he got up from the table, slamming his fists into it. His sudden display of anger stunned Christopher, who opened his mouth to say something. But before he had a chance to call his father out on his behavior Bobby had already stormed off, since he didn’t want his son to see him like this. It just threw him so much to find out that Katherine had kidnapped Pam that he needed to be alone to sort out his emotions. So he took off wondering if he’d really done the same mistake twice in letting Pam go over some stupid letter. It was a mistake that he wished he hadn’t made at all, but to make it twice was unforgivable.

 

[Pammy P]

Oh my, this is so gripping, more ! Thank you

 

[Mrs Bobby James Ewing]

Great updates Karin! I love your story so much. Your story is so much better than the last 4 years of original Dallas and TNT’s Dallas. You should have been a writer for TNT’s Dallas because you know all of the characters so well and a true fan of original Dallas who loves the show just as much as I do even though I wasn’t a fan of TNT’s Dallas. Plus I am looking forward to Bobby and Pam reuniting their family in your story because they are perfect for each other and they belong together despite the Barnes Ewing feud.

 

[Karin Schill]

Thank you for the feedback. It's always much appreciated.

@Pammy P I am glad that you found the story gripping.
There's still a lot more to come of this story, as I just posted page 59 out of 200 pages!

@Mrs Bobby James Ewing I'm glad that you love my new story. Wow! That's really a compliment saying that I should have been a writer on Dallas TNT. I'm flattered.
But yeah you are right about that I am a true Dallas fan who love the show and I do know these characters well after writing about them in fanfics for so many years. However in the last update I am sure you recoginzed that the flashback scene was not mine, but that I borrowed it from the original Dallas.

Also since you were good with the feedback you're getting a double treat tonight!

*

Elena woke up by the sound of a key in the door. Looking up she was surprised to see that it was her boyfriend, who was back already. For a moment she wondered how long she had overslept, but throwing one glance at the alarm clock she could see that it was not even nine in the morning. “Christopher? What are you doing back already?” Elena asked surprised. “I thought you were helping your dad on the ranch today.”

“So did I,” Christopher sighed. “But he just took off.”

“Why? What happened?” Elena asked, as she got out of bed and walked up to him. “Did you two have a fight again?”

“No,” Christopher shook his head.

“No?” Elena asked. “Then what?”

“I told him about my mom,” Christopher sighed heavily.

“And he didn’t like that you’ve gone to see her?”

“No that’s not it,” Christopher rubbed his forehead. “He was upset when I told him that Katherine had kidnapped mom. I’m not sure he even believed me when I told him that it was Katherine who had written the letter that he received from mom.”

“Well maybe that’s not so strange,” Elena said.

“It still upsets me though that my dad won’t take my word for it,” Christopher said. “I mean I believe mom so why can’t he?”

“Maybe that’s not it,” Elena said and seeing Christopher giving her a weird look she elaborated, “Remember how you felt when I told you about the e-mail?”

"Yeah," Christopher frowned, as he was not following her, “ but what does that has to do with anything?”

“Maybe that’s how your dad is feeling right now?”

“No way,” Christopher shook his head. “I was upset because I still loved you but I was about to marry someone else...”

“I know so we couldn’t be together then. Just like your dad can’t be with your mom now since he’s married to Ann.”

Christopher dropped his chin when he realized what she was implying, “You really think my dad still loves my mom?”

“I don’t know,” Elena shrugged her shoulders. “But I always thought they seemed happy when they were together so I guess it’s possible.”

“Now when you mention it, their marriage was dissolved without them ever talking about it, so there is definitely something unfinished between them,” Christopher said.

“Then they need to finish whatever’s lingering between them since if they don’t it’s just gonna tug at his heart until he explodes,” Elena said and Christopher nodded since what his girlfriend was telling him was making a lot of sense. So maybe that really was what was bothering his dad. That he’d never got a chance to say a proper goodbye to his wife.

 

[Karin Schill]

Bobby was out riding on the ranch alone. He was working his horse really hard, as he was taking out his frustrations on the horse. He didn’t know where he was going, as he was just riding around aimlessly, trying to clear his mind. But it was hard to do since he was so upset that he didn’t know whether to laugh or cry, because if Christopher was telling him the truth it meant that he had done the biggest mistake in his life when he’d stopped looking for his wife after she’d disappeared from that hospital. It was so stupid really since at first he had suspected that Katherine was behind it but after he’d met the board of director of Wentworth industries who had reassured him that Mrs. Ewing had wanted to leave and that she had written a letter to him explaining it all, he had let go of that notion together with his wife. Realizing his mistake now so many years later made him feel so conflicted. He was disillusioned, hurt, confused and most of all angry. Angry with Pam for driving recklessly, angry with life for being so unfair to him and angry with himself for letting Pam go so easily. Oh Pam why didn’t I look for you? He wondered, as he got off his horse and walked up to the love tree. He looked on the tree for the inscription that read Bob + Pam and as he let his hands gently touch it the hot angry tears rolled down his cheeks, as he began to cry.

“Oh Pam, why?” He sobbed, as the realization of that his first wife never had wanted to leave him and what that meant was finally sinking in. He now knew that he had been robbed of 28 years that he could have spent with Pam if only he had bothered to track her down after she had disappeared from the hospital. His wife had been kidnapped and he had not even bothered to look for her. It was a bitter pill to swallow and he now blamed himself for what had happened. It hurt like hell to know that because of his hurt pride and stubbornness his son had grown up without a mother and he and Pam had been deprived of any chance they might have had of having another child. It was all so unfair and finally knowing the truth about what had happened made him feel so gullible. He regretted so much not having looked for Pam then. But he hadn’t. All these years he’d wondered if he would ever be able to forgive Pam for leaving them but now when he knew that he’d been wrong all these years he instead found himself wondering if Pam could ever forgive him for letting her go that easily.

To Be Continued...

 

[Pammy P]

Require more, better than TNT crap, whilst reading I can imagine the scene

 

[Karin Schill]

Thank you for the feedback @Pammy P , I am glad that you think this story is better than what we saw on Dallas TNT. I take that as a compliment.

Now let's see what Pam thinks of John Ross plan to take over Ewing Global...

*

Chapter seven



Pam and Josephine were already seated at a table in the restaurant when John Ross and Pamela Rebecca came walking up to them. Taking a better look at her niece and nephew Pam could see that they made a striking pair. She knew that young successful couples like that could be envied by other people who thought they had everything a person could possibly want; love, money, success and a comfortable lifestyle that most people only dreamt of achieving. Yes Pam knew it well since 30 years ago that young successful couple had been her and Bobby. Only difference was that their union was one born out of passionate love. Taking a closer look at Pamela Rebecca and John Ross she wasn’t as sure that their marriage had taken place for the right reason, as there was something about the way they looked at each other that suggested business merger rather than true love. But then again just like she and Bobby they had gone against their fathers' wishes to get married and the Ewing-Barnes feud be damned. So maybe it is a love match after all?

“Aunt Pam,” John Ross grinned, as he walked up to her and shook her hand.

“Hello John Ross,” Pam said returning his greeting.

“So we meet again,” John Ross said before motioning towards his wife. “This is my wife.”

“Hi Pamela Rebecca,” Pam smiled warmly at Cliff and Afton’s daughter, as she tried to see which one of her parents she resembled the most.

“Hi Aunt Pam,” Pamela Rebecca said, as she extended her hand, “It’s so nice to finally get to spend some proper time together with the woman my mom named me after.”

Pam smiled, “So you’re called Pamela?”

“Yeah I’m Pamela Ewing, just like you were,” Pamela Rebecca replied.

“Isn’t that cool?” John Ross grinned and Pam smiled at Pamela.

However Josephine was not as impressed by all this, as she reminded them, “Well my mother’s Pamela Greco now!”

“Of course, nice to see you again sis,” John Ross said before giving Josephine a hug. “I’m so glad you could pull this off.”

“Pull what off?” Pam asked suspiciously.

“Oh John Ross just means that he’s happy that I’ve arranged this lunch,” Josephine hurried to smooth things over. “He and Pamela were so looking forward to see you.”

“Yeah considering that I’ve just lost my father you’re my last link to that side of my family,” Pamela said. “So it’s important to have you in my life.”

“Funny to hear you say that since I didn’t think you cared about your father,” Pam said in an accusing tone of voice. “I mean a loving daughter would never leave her father to rot in prison.”

“Pamela had her reasons for that,” John Ross supported his wife.

“Yes I wanted to end the Ewing-Barnes feud,” Pamela explained. “If I had let him out he would have come after my husband’s family with all he got and I didn’t want to be a part of that. I am sure you can understand that better than anyone.”

“Yes but leaving your father in jail was not the way to do that,” Pam said. “Do you know how much it hurt your father?”

Pamela’s lip trembled and seeing how much that remark got to his wife John Ross hurried to jump to her defense.“I should have known you’d side with your brother. After all uncle Bobby even warned me when I got married that his Pamela always sided with the Barnes first if there ever was a conflict between the Barnes and the Ewings.”

His words had the desired effect on his aunt Pam, who shifted uncomfortably at the mentioning of her ex-husbands’ name. “Bobby told you that?”

“Yes,” John Ross nodded. “He understands what Pamela and I are going through better than anyone else. Anyway if you really want to avenge your brother’s time in jail I know how we can do so.”

“Excuse me?” Pam crossed her arms, as she gave John Ross a questioning look.

“Your brother was a very successful business man. Much more so than my dad ever was,” John Ross elaborated. “It pains me to admit it but with my dad out of the way Cliff built up a company called Barnes Global that was one of the biggest independent energy companies in this part of the world.”

“Yes he mentioned something about that,” Pam said. “But I understand he lost the company before he died?”

“He didn’t lose it, it was taken from him by the Ewings,” Pamela said. “At the same time as they conned me into believing that he had killed JR, they also stole my father’s company.”

“I see, but I don’t get what this has to do with me,” Pam said.

“It’s all very simple mom, ” Josephine said. “Barnes Global was built up of what used to be Wentworth Industries, a company that Rebecca left you, Cliff and Katherine but since Katherine died and you were presumed dead Cliff claimed the whole company as his.”

“Which means that you and Josephine were robbed out of your shares,” Pamela explained.

“So that’s what this is all about?” Pam asked before she turned to John Ross. “You want to give me and Josephine back our shares in your company?”

“I wish I could do that ma’am, but I don’t exactly control the company anymore,” John Ross said.

“Then who does?” Pam asked.

“My mom and uncle Bobby does,” John Ross dropped the bomb on Pam.

“What?” Pam dropped her cheek. “Bobby swindled Cliff out of his company?”

“Yes,” Pamela nodded.

“But why?” Pam didn’t get it.

“Because he’s changed,” John Ross said. “He’s not the same man that you knew when you were married to him.”

“No there must be more to it than that,” Pam shook her head since she couldn't believe that Bobby had changed this much. “You’d better tell me the truth or...”

“Alright so Ewing Oil also got swallowed up by that company,” John Ross said. “So I guess my mama and uncle Bobby just wanted to take back what they considered was rightfully the Ewings.”

“I see,” Pam nodded since that explained it.

“Still that doesn’t change the fact that you and Josephine have a stake in Ewing Global and Josephine here intends to sue the company to get her share and...” John Ross was interrupted by Pam who turned to her daughter.

“Josephine is that true?”

“Yes and we hope you will join us,” Josephine said.

“Sue Bobby and Sue Ellen you mean?” Pam asked.

“Well sue Ewing Global,” John Ross said. “But technically yeah.”

“So what do you say mom?” Josephine asked. “Should we take back what is rightfully ours?”

Josephine, Pamela and John Ross all looked at her with hope in their eyes and yet she had to make them disappointed. “No, I won’t go up against Bobby.”

“What?” Pamela exclaimed.

“Why not?” Josephine asked, crossing her arms.

“Because I know what Ewing Oil means to Bobby and I am not going after something which was rightfully his,” Pam said.

“But Bobby sold Ewing Oil,” John Ross informed Pam. “So he gave up his right to the company already in the 1990s.”

Pam dropped her chin when she heard that, “Bobby sold Ewing Oil?”

“Yeah after April was killed. The second Mrs. Ewing, you know?” John Ross informed Pam. “He sure loved that woman.”

His words hurt Pam more than she liked to admit and not wanting to give John Ross the satisfaction of seeing it, she said, “He wouldn’t have looked twice at her if I hadn’t been in that car crash.”

“Probably,” John Ross said. “But you were and that changed everything.”

“Yeah,” Pam admitted. “It gave Katherine a chance to kidnap me!”

“Exactly and did uncle Bobby even bother to look for you?” John Ross said. “No he just signed the divorce papers when they arrived. So as far as I am concerned you don’t owe him anything.”

“Yeah why should you remain loyal to him when he abandoned you?” Pamela asked.

“He didn’t abandon me,” Pam insisted. “It was all Katherine’s doing. She wrote him a letter, claiming to be me, where she told him not to try and find me.”

“So he gave up on you,” Josephine said and Pam made a face.

Seeing how vulnerable his aunt looked John Ross decided to twist in the knife a little bit further, “No offence ma’am. But if the woman I loved had been kidnapped, I would have moved heaven and earth to find her,” John Ross said, not noticing how his words made his wife flinch.

“Yeah so that Bobby didn’t just proves that he is not worthy of your loyalty mom. So why don’t you just join our lawsuit?” Josephine asked. “My lawyer tells me we have a strong case.”

Pam looked from Josephine to Pamela and John Ross and that’s when she could see it, the resemblance between John Ross and his father. Realizing that John Ross had more of his father in him than she had hoped she said firmly, “My answer is still no. So if you want to sue Bobby and Sue Ellen, you’ll have to do it without me,” Pam said and the others sighed since that was not the answer they had hoped for.

 

[pd fan]

Great story, Karin I ' m agree with Pammy it's better than the Tnt version , you're very creative , congrats for what you did and to give a little of dream especially in this moment

 

[Karin Schill]

Thank you Silvie. You're so kind to say that I'm creative and that you like the story more than the Dallas TNT version. I appreciate the compliment.
You know it's odd but writing for the Dallas TNT characters has made me like them more. So I don't think the problem with Dallas TNT was with the characters CC created. It was the pacing and plots that left something to be desired.

I'm also glad to hear that you appreciate this little dream world right now when the situation in the real world is so crappy!

Okay on to the next part.

*

Emma was sitting on her room, filing her nails while her parents were trying to get through to her and have a serious talk. But she did her best to block them out. She was not in the mood to listen to anything that they had to say to her. “Emma please, we really think that it would be best if you went with me to see Doctor Williams,” Ann said.

But Emma remained silent, not even dignifying their suggestion with a response. So her father tried another approach, “Your mother is right Emma. You have been through a traumatic experience so you will need to see a professional.”

“I don’t want to,” Emma finally said, giving them a defiant look.

“Honey I know you are hurting and believe me when I say that if I could ring the neck of Luis for laying a finger on my sweet little girl...” Harris face hardened. “When I think of that disgusting pig, raping you...”

That finally caught Emma’s attention, as she dropped the file and looked up, with horror on her face, at her father, “What did you say?”

Harris harked before he clarified, “Your mother told me what Luis did to you,”

Emma stood up when she heard that. “How dare you?” She pointed her finger at her mother. “I told you about that in confidence and you betrayed my trust?”

“No you asked me not to tell my husband and I swear I haven’t,” Ann said. “But Harris is your father. So he has the right to know.”

“If I had wanted dad to know I would have told him myself,” Emma said angrily. “Now get the hell out of my room!”

“No Emma, your mother only told me because...”

“I said leave me the hell alone!” Emma yelled and stomped her foot.

“Emma please,” Ann tried again. “We just want to help you.”

“Well maybe I don’t want your help!” Emma yelled. “Now get out!”

“Can’t you at least think about seeing that shrink. I think it would do you some good,” Harris said.

“No,” Emma shook her head, “I will not see that stupid brainwasher and that’s final!” Emma took both of her parents arms and ushered them out the door, then she hurried to turn back around and run into her room again, slamming the door shut behind her.

Harris and Ann exchanged a look as they stood in the hallway and Ann sighed, “That went well.”

“Well give Emma some time and I’m sure she will come around to our way of thinking,” Harris said.

“I hope so, since I’m really worried about her,” Ann confided in her ex-husband.

“So am I,” Harris said, since the sexual assault had changed his little girl so much that she was barely recognizable and it hurt him to see. All her life he had done his best to protect Emma from unsuitable men. When Drew Ramos had shown an interest in her he had split them up before the poor man could hurt his little princess. But this time he had failed to protect Emma and the knowledge of that made him feel something he rarely ever felt; utterly powerless...

 

[Karin Schill]

Later that evening were John Ross and Pamela Rebecca getting ready to go to bed when John Ross leant down to kiss his wife only to notice that she turned away, giving him the cold shoulder. “Hey what’s the matter honey?”

“Nothing’s the matter,” Pamela said in a chilly tone of voice.

“Oh come on don’t give me that bull. I can see that something’s bothering you. So why don’t you tell me what it is?”

“Alright if you really wanna know what’s bothering me. It’s you and Emma!”

“Emma?” John Ross asked surprised, as he hadn’t expected her to still be hung up on his affair.

“Do you love her?”

“ What?” John Ross asked surprised. “Why do you ask me that?”

“Do you?”

“Of course not,” John Ross denied it. “I’m married to you.”

“Yeah but you slept with her,” Pam said.

“But that was just for business.”

“No she must have meant something more to you, or you wouldn’t have gone off to Mexico to rescue her when she was kidnapped. Like you told aunt Pam, if the woman you loved was kidnapped you would have gotten her back.”

“So that’s what this is all about?” John Ross sighed. “You’re upset because I told aunt Pam that I would do anything for the woman I loved?”

“Well Emma was kidnapped and you did rescue her,” Pamela reasoned.

“I did,” John Ross acknowledged. “But I didn’t go to Mexico for her. I was there to bargain with the cartel to get Ewing global back. It was a business proposal...”

“And Emma?”

“She was just a part of the bargain,” John Ross said.

“So you don’t love her?”

“No I never have,” John Ross said, before he held up his hand, “I swear it’s the truth.”

“Alright I believe you,” Pamela said, looking relieved to hear that.

“Good since it is you I love,” John Ross said.

“I love you too,” Pamela said, “that’s why I don’t want to share you ever again. I want you to be just mine.”

“I am yours,” John Ross said huskily before he leant down to kiss her and this time she hungrily met his lips in a passionate kiss before they ended up making love once more.

 

[supermanfan]

Awesome stuff

 

[Karin Schill]

Thank you Shan. I am glad that you think the story is awesome.

Thank you also to everyone who has been rating the posts.

*

Later that night all the lights at Southfork had gone out, as the people in the house were all sound asleep. But out in the storage room by the garage there was a light on, as Bobby had snuck out of the house to go look for something. He hadn’t been able to go to sleep and after laying awake for two hours, listening to the sound of his wife’s breathing, he had eventually given up and got up. This was just something he had to do and it couldn’t wait until morning. He needed some answers now. So he turned the place upside down, while he looked for the letter and eventually he found it. His hands trembled as he opened it and began reading it.

“My Darling Bobby,

Please forgive me. I know how I’ve hurt you and Christopher but believe me I’ve done the best thing for all of us. When I saw myself in the mirror, I couldn’t stand the thought of you or Christopher ever seeing me that way. I don’t know if anything can ever be done to help me but I couldn’t stand to destroy our love by having you see me the way I am. You know how much I love you both and if you love me I beg you not to try and find me. Remember me as I was before the accident and take care of our son. The hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life is to leave the two of you. Understand that and please let me find the way myself. I love you forever. Pam.”

Reading the letter over and over again he started to remember another letter that had been read to him by Katherine all those years ago.

“I was sure I wanted a divorce from my husband. I am less sure now only because I know a divorce from him would hurt him very deeply. Bobby and I have grown apart and my love for him has changed. But I still care deeply for Bobby and would never ever hurt him and therefore our marriage can’t be easily dismissed. Therefore I might remain with my husband even if it no longer makes me happy in order to avoid causing him that pain, perhaps that’s what I have to do. I know we would both be better off if Bobby would just let me go. But if he doesn’t I may have to return to him and if I do I have to put his happiness above my own.”

Remembering the words that Katherine had read him he could see it more clearly now. Both letters had a streak of a selflessness, of wanting to do what she thought was best for him, whether that was leaving him or returning to him. It was about putting his needs above her own and spare him of pain. Both letters also pleaded with him to let her go since it was for the best. Coming to that realization and staring at the typed letter he held in his hands he felt like kicking himself for not seeing it before. But he had been too hurt and completely devastated when he received the letter to doubt that it could be from anyone else but Pam. Besides the chairman of Wentworth Industries had reassured him that it was Pam’s wish to leave him and that Katherine was not involved and blindly he had trusted the man. But knowing what he knew now he realized that the man must have been in on the conspiracy with Katherine. It must have been Katherine who had given him the letter and told him what to tell Bobby and he had believed him.

Now he felt incredibly guilty for doing so. For just giving up on his wife without even a proper conversation. He and Pam had been married for 8 years all together so he should have known her well enough to know that she would never just write a dear john letter to end their marriage. It was not her style. The first time she had wanted to file for a divorce she had told him in person. So even if she didn’t want him to see her she would at least have called him. But she hadn’t and he had let Katherine’s letter fool him. But why?

Looking deep down in his heart for an answer he suddenly remember a conversation he had had with his mother after Pam’s accident.

He had been standing on the Southfork patio, leaning against a pillar with his back towards his mother, who had been sitting down in a chair, “Bobby, what is it?” She had asked him in a concerned voice. “What’s wrong?”

“I’m scared mama,” he confided in her, “I am scared about the way she’s gonna feel.”

“What do you mean?”

Then he turned around to look at her, “Do you remember how you felt after you had had the mastectomy?” Seeing his mother look down, he could still see the pain on her face, “The problems you and daddy had, that you didn’t think you were the same woman that he fell in love with?”

She nodded, before saying in a vulnerable voice, “I remember.”

“There you see, you still have some of those feelings and it was years ago,” he’d said in a troubled voice.

She sighed deeply, “Well it’s not an easy thing to get over,” She paused before adding with a small smile in the corner of her mouth, “But I did.”

“But it took time,” he leant against the pillar again, “a long time before you really felt you were still the same woman that daddy loved.”

She licked her lips and looked down before admitting, “Yes.”

“What if Pam has those same feelings?”

“Then you must stand by her,” his mother said as a tear spilled over in the corner of her eye, “and love her, the way your daddy did me.”

“Mama, what if she doesn’t want me by her?” Bobby had asked her as he’d walked up to sit down opposite his mother, looking into her eyes. “As much as I love her there’s still a chance she’s not gonna want me with her.”

She’d gently touched his hand, “It will work itself out Bobby. I know it will,” she’d said reassuringly and he’d sighed, as his mother went on, “If it’s one thing I know, Pam loves you very much, so no matter how she feels now, you stick by her,” he could see the love and tears in his mother’s eyes as she urged him to be a better man, “Because even if she doesn’t know it she needs you.”

Remembering that conversation with his mother the tears ran down Bobby’s face. Because he had not done what his mother had wanted him to do. He had not stood by his wife. He had let her go because a part of him had been scared that he would react badly to how Pam looked after the accident. So that goodbye letter had played on his fears and offered him a way out and he had taken it. He had justified his decision with that he had only done what Pam had asked him to do because he loved her. But he knew now that it was not true. “If it’s one thing I know, Pam loves you very much, so no matter how she feels now, you stick by her. Because even if she doesn’t know it she needs you.” His mama’s voice of reason still echoed in his ears and looking back he wished that he had been the man his father was. The one who didn’t take no for an answer and who stood by his woman come hell or high water. If he had, he and Pam would have celebrated their 30th Wedding Anniversary next year. But instead he had given up on her only a year into their second marriage. He had also ignored how much his decision not to look for Pam had hurt their son.

Christopher had sat on a fence, out on the ranch as he had been trying to explain to him why Pam had left. But their son had his own way of reasoning, “Now I know why she didn’t wanna see me and why she left,” Christopher had sounded defensive.

He’d dropped his mouth as he hadn’t expected that, “Is that right?”

“Sure, she doesn’t love me anymore because I am adopted,” Christopher had licked his lips and looked so sad that it broke his heart.

“Oh no,” he shook his head, trying to make him understand, “that’s absolutely not true.”

“Then why don’t you find her?” Their son had asked him. “I know you could if you really wanted to.”

He swallowed as he thought it over. “Yes I suppose I could...”

“See but you won’t cause you know mama doesn’t love me anymore,” Christopher had said in a hurt voice and he’d done his best to comfort their son.

But he hadn’t done the one thing his son had asked him to do. Find his mother and bring her back home. No instead he’d run around with a bunch of other women. He’d had some one night stands and some shorter relationships but none had filled the void that Pam had left in his heart. Then he had fallen in love with April and when he had told his son that he was getting married again Christopher had not reacted with joy. No instead he had stubbornly held out hope that his mother might come back. “What if Mama came back and you were married?” His son’s voice echoed in his ears now. He had always told his son that Pam would never come back and yet now the one thing he had never thought would happen had happened at last. Pam had come back and he was married to someone else. He had told his son that Pam being back changed nothing. Yet he was only fooling himself, because deep down he knew that Pam coming back did matter and it posed a threat to his marriage. So he did the only thing he could do, he kept his distance from her for the sake of his marriage. Even though he sure felt guilty about the way his marriage to Pam had ended now and a part of him wanted nothing more than to go see Pam and beg for her forgiveness.

 

[supermanfan]

Omg so good

 

[Pammy P]

OMG so so so good, very good, exceptional......in fact

 

[ilovesoaps100]

Give me bobby/pam reunion

 

[Pammy P]

It's on the cards a reunion